D for JK.

Received a call from the field producers of the Jimmy Kimmel Show today.
They asked if I'd be interested in directing for them during the month of May.

It's kind of weird.
I'd be making things for a national, mainstream audience,
which is something I've never done before,
or had any interest in doing for that matter.

I've been living in my own head for so long
and making things by instinct with total creative freedom,
it's hard for me to imagine what this might be like.

They said I'd have to join the Director's Guild and pay my dues
and I'll have to travel back to sweaty Los Angeles for a bit.

I guess if it all pans out,
it'll be a learning experience one way or the other.

Who knows?
Life is so fucking nuts.
One minute I feel like I'm face down in the gutter,
and the next,
I'm being invited to work in a shiny, polished gutter for money.

Hopefully, I can at least pet some of the weird, sewer alligators!!

(I mean... cough... celebrities)

How to Avoid a Potentially Dangerous Situation - Almost Robbed

The other night, while driving back from a pancake house with Dustin and Mitch, I encountered a potentially dangerous situation. It was around 3 AM and we were in Dustin's brother's truck (a GIANT Dodge RAM, complete with a lift kit and 36" tires). We had just pulled into a residential neighborhood when a strange truck aggressively pulled up behind us and began honking. Thinking there might be something wrong with our truck, we stopped and cracked the window. Like lightning, a shady guy came shuffling towards us with his hands buried deep in his pockets. His voice was quiet and his eyes were cold. At first he seemed to approach us with intent, but upon discovering 3 of us in the truck, he soon backed off and began to rant on about how he "lives in Guthrie" and is "working construction on his dad's house" and needed "gas money to get home". Throughout the story his right hand stayed buried in his pocket.

Now... the good part.

Dustin couldn't really see the guy because our truck was so tall. Also, he couldn't move much because he was wearing a life-size BEAR SUIT from shooting a scene in our latest film at the pancake house. Mitch was also in costume, wearing REALLY BIG EYEBROWS and a weird FAKE MOUSTACHE.

Due to the time of night, the stranger's aggressive driving maneuvers, and the bizarre disposition of his character, had there only been one of us in the truck, we believe this guy's intention was to mug the driver. HOWEVER, when he finally got a look at the cargo... which looked a lot like THIS:

our little mystery man quickly changed his strategy to BEGGING for money
instead of TAKING IT.

I wish Mitch would've spoken in a serious, baritone voice and said:
"Hey there Buddy. Wanna join the party?"

I only wish I knew what that guy was thinking when he drove away.

Today's To Do List

Today, I rented both a grizzly bear costume and a
private wedding chapel.

I played a little music,
ate some grapes,
and did the dishes.

I also mailed some letters,
placed a black tarp over my future garden,
drank tea,
and played a little more music.

And thanks to that pleasant, bubblegum flavored circle,
I spent some time reminiscing Chewels,

Tidal Wave,

and Pillsbury Food Sticks. Ahhhh. Pillsbury Food Sticks. Such Memories.

Wait a second... I don't remember Pillsbury Foodsticks. FOOD STICKS?
I didn't eat Pillsbury Food Sticks. I don't even know what they are.

Food Sticks? What's a food stick? And what are the ingredients?
Let's check...

Hmmm. Sounds pretty good.

Daily Country Escape

Went driving out in the country today.

I got pretty far out there and stopped to take some pictures.
It seems like everytime I pull the car over and step out to look around
a random, passing truck will also pull over to ask me what I'm doing.

I suppose if I had my own land far away from the busy bubble of the concrete world
I'd be protective of it, too.

Someday.

(Just not too far away, because I do like having friends)