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TO HYPER TO TYPE to tired to talk

i have not been able to think clearly lately.

or perhaps i've NEVER been able to think clearly
and i've just gotten lucky getting ANYTHING
done at all.

i feel like i'm trapped under a thin sheet of gauze,
in a room full of cotton balls.
i can see things in front of me, but not clearly.
i grab at masses but nothing is grounded.
there's nothing to hold onto.
when i breathe,
bits of fuzz fill my mouth.

even in the face of good fortune,
an open door,
i seem to keep banging on the wall
as if more doors may open.

what the fuck is wrong with me?

wait...

i know...

i'm in love
with a god damn ghost.